Saturday, 28 April 2012

The proof is in the pudding

I was cooking dinner, the fishcakes were browning under the grill the vegetables prepared and ready for a couple of minutes in boiling water. I had cut a sweetcorn into two and the pieces sat waiting on the chopping board. I left the kitchen for a little while while the grill slowly did it's business. On my return I noticed just one solitary piece of corn.

Questioning Hazel revealed that she had not moved it - she wasn't tricking me, or trying to make me think I had lost the plot. At that moment the dog skipped down the corridor licking his lips. Did he do it, is he a thief? The evidence is at best circumstantial, the looking pleased with himself demeanor, the skip in his step, the small damp patch on the studio floor indicating an impromptu picnic site. In his defence he has never stolen from the kitchen sides before but we do know he is motivated by food.

I have my suspicions but the proof will be back from forensics tomorrow - I am sure the corn will tell the story.

Monday, 9 April 2012


Oh dear... we were all downstairs for lunch but the wayward mutt was awol. Obviously it it was Easter egg hunt time!! He was found in Hannah's room on her desk eating a nice Cadbury egg, he has cleverly managed to take them from the box and unwrap in virtual silence.

This afternoon Marley sleeps in his crate in disgrace and Hannah sulks in her bedroom. You have to love a wet bank holiday Monday.

Saturday, 3 March 2012

Bloody Dog

At the weekend I was chatting to a couple whilst their young grandchild was making a fuss of the dogs. I said to the little lad, "This is Bob and Marley'. The grandmother told me that she already knew Marley, he was a regular visitor to their garden to steal food from the bird table - although she did mention he was a lovely dog. She than added that she wouldn't be seeing him anymore as they had a new fence!!

So, this morning I couldn't find the wayward hound. I heard a banging from the direction of the old couples garden. A quick look over the fence and I saw that Marley had successfully negated the new perimeter and to make matters worse had knocked over the newly installed bird table, the contents strewn across the lawn, a real Labrador picnic.

Bloody dog!!

Monday, 6 February 2012

Dancing on ice

A Marley moment - this wasn't quite a Marley adventure! 

Picture the scene, this morning's winter walk. A road cleared by the snow plough but still a shallow compact covering making things very slippery. I was tentatively moving forward on a steady course a dog on each side of me with them gently pulling on their leads. 

Ahead of us a lady with a small terrier - it spots my two and in a small dog way utters a little bark. Marley understands that this means 'Hey, come and play in the snow' and lurches forward. Not wanting to be left out Bob follows.

Sixty plus kilograms of dog force mean I have little choice but to go along with them scrabbling for balance and grip - like something from the Dancing on Ice out takes. We quickly arrive at our new friends, the little terrier now wishes he hadn't said hello and cowers behind his owner spinning her so she was no longer facing us.

Marley darts to her right and Bob to her left like a well practiced pinser movement. I have little choice, in fact - no choice, collision is inevitable. Contact is made like a high speed Heimlich maneuver on ice. After a brief flurry of twisted leads we untangle ourselves and I drag the mutts away. I am not saying contact was close but I am so glad I had cleaned my teeth.

Wednesday, 25 January 2012

It's me or the dog?

Marley's watched two episodes of 'It's me or the Dog' and his behaviour doesn't seem to have improved. It is no good he is going to have to watch another episode tonight!!